For the woman who prioritises her relationship with Allah, self-love is not a vain concept. It’s not about demanding princess treatment or indulging in a 12 step skincare routine. It’s about nurturing the relationship you have with yourself. Creating your dream life from the inside out, which begins with you. Giving yourself the love you seek. Does that sound foreign to you?;) I hope not, let’s get straight to it!

1. Dhikr + Processing Your Feelings 

This is unbelievably powerful. When you’re feeling triggered or emotional, sit with the feelings of your heart whilst reciting dhikr. Feel the discomfort and surrender it to Allah.  Stay with it until you feel lighter in your body. The key is to feel it in your body, feel it in your heart without thinking about it. When you recite dhikr, you can’t get stuck in your thoughts of he did this and she said that. When you recite dhikr, the mind chatter begins to fall away. You can’t be reciting Allah’s name in one breath and wanting to slam the kitchen door on your next breath! You get the picture 😆

2. Create A Tahajjud Routine 

Love is sacrificing your sleep, waking up in the early hours to speak to Allah. In the quietest and darkest hours, your heart yearns for Him. It truly is a way of expressing your love for Allah. Create a tahajjud routine that works for you – it might be every Friday night, weekends only, every second day etc.

When your life is organised around your daily salah, waking up for tahajjud and worshiping Allah, it boosts your self-worth. Of course it would! You feel more grounded and happier in yourself  because you’re doing what you’ve been created for. Your self-love flourishes when you heart is centred in worshipping and surrendering to Allah.

3. Speak To Allah All Day Long  

This might sound mad. Oh well! Spend your entire day talking to Allah. When you notice something beautiful, tell Allah about it. When you feel grateful, thank Allah out loud. If something bothers you, look up and ask Allah to help you. In your duas, have a full conversation with Allah. Say everything, give all the details, speak out an essay if need be. One of the most healing and therapeutic practices is speaking to Allah with an open and sincere heart. Tell Allah everything.

4. Journal Regularly 

The beautiful thing about journaling is that you can make it work for you. When you’re feeling inspired, make a list of what your dream dua feels like. When you’re sad, emotionally dump your feelings on paper. If someone has hurt you, write them a letter in your journal to help you release the past. Jot down your productivity wins for the day. Draw and speak to your inner child. It might sound silly but when I first started drawing the pain in my body, I bawled my eyes out like a little girl. Simply because by drawing I was able to relate to my inner child in a way that she recognised. Isn’t that what you did as a child? Drawing and colouring to express your imagination. Sometimes images and memories can access parts of ourselves that we may not have easily accessed with words alone.

5. Read Books + Magazines 

In the age of short form content, read. Read a book or pick up a magazine. There’s something about putting your phone away, not getting distracted every 3 minutes and committing to a book. It’s time spent with yourself, which I think is beautiful. The best books are read again and again. If a paragraph resonates with you, highlight it and read it again and again. How many times have you saved a post on Instagram and never looked at it again? Yep, me too 😩 There’s so much incredible content out there, consume less and embody it deeper. Let that book weave into your life.

6. Live For Yourself  

The biggest mistake you can make is to centre your life around anything or anyone else but you. Not your career, not your children, not your parents but you – you as a whole human being in and enough within yourself. This isn’t to say you should neglect your family or abandon your passions, absolutely not! The difference is you’re not codependent on them. You’re life isn’t centred around trying to make everyone happy or trying to prove your worth to them. 

What’s the opposite of creating attraction? Repelling maybe? Whatever it is, certain energies and behaviours can push people away. Too much focus on others, neglecting your needs, ignoring your intuition, numbing your feelings, thinking about another person/ problem all day long means you’ve abandoned your own self. Sweet girl, it’s you that you’ve been looking for all this time. The marriage, kids, money, passions are just means to amplify your life but never the source of your happiness. 

Ps. If you’d like to heal your inner child, strengthen your self-love and work towards calling in your deepest duas and dreams, head over here to learn more about my 1-1 coaching offers. There’s a free 20 minute call with limited spaces available!